As a parent, teacher, or boss have you ever felt like the people you lead have zoned you out? Here are some common coaching behaviors that lead to zoning out…
- If you are a yeller chances are the teams you lead will eventually zone out to your rants. For a great example of this visit Wal-Mart on a weekend and watch how the kid in the stroller zones out as their parent yells.
- If you make a lot of idle threats chances are your team will eventually start to zone you out. Two year olds are smart enough to figure this one out.
- If you overreact chances are your team will start to zone you out. At first your team will respond to your panic but when it happens on a weekly basis your team will zone you out because they are used to you overreacting.
- If you don’t uphold the rules or standards. A fast way to lose control of your team, whether it’s a family, or employees is set rules and then not follow up with the consequences.
- If you don’t communicate the rules your team will start to zone you out. If you yell at someone because they broke a rule that you haven’t communicated then it’s your fault not theirs. An example of this is the students in my small group. They used to text all throughout group. At first I got mad, but I never communicated with them that what they were doing was distracting. I set up a no texting rule and now it’s a part of our weekly ritual. We all turn our cell phones off before group starts.
- If you don’t listen to your team they will zone you out and not listen to you. One of the biggest complaints I hear teenagers say to me in counseling situations is that their parents don’t listen to them. I think that parents should find some one on one time to just hang out with each of their kids. Allow them to just talk. Do something they like. Take them out to their favorite restaurant. Spend consistent time with them and eventually they will communicate with you.
It’s really hard to keep your teams attention. It’s even harder to win it back once they start to zone you out. Be consistant in how you handle adversity, but be creative in how you communicate to your team. Those are my thoughts on the subject…I’d love to hear yours.
I know I ride pretty hard on my crew at work. We are always, it seems, behind schedule and over budget. There is always a huge amount of work to carry out. One of my rules that I try to stay on top of, is to never ask someone to do something that I am not willing to do myself. When it comes to dealing with the garbage work or grunt work, I require myself to handle my share. I guess this is kind of an example of leading by example.
Rob that was a really good post. Because I wear a lot of those hats you mention I can definitly see where I can improve my communication in different areas.
Daniel, great example.
Courtney, thank you. And thanks for the comment.
Great post…I think having a 2 year old shows me how true all this is! 🙂 They definitely know when you are making idle threats, and don't plan on following through with what you say.
Great post, and I agree w/each of the bullets you listed.
Great post, and I agree w/each of the bullets you listed.
Thanks AL!
Thank you Leah.
very good post. I definitely need some work in this area, communication and reactions. I tend to do all those things at one time or another. I've been working on it with some successes, but this reminds me that I need to keep working on it, and that I have a long way to go.
I don't really make resolutions, but I do pick a few things to improve. This is one of them. Thanks for making a checklist.