Irene, the panic inducing hurricane, is bearing down on the 757. Since I live in the 757 I have been preparing for her. Here’s how…
Make sure I’m prepared for Irene. Check. I have three cases of Mtn. Dew just in case we get stranded in our house.
Listen to the song Hello Hurricane by Switchfoot on repeat for an entire day. Check. That song makes me feel like I could put Irene in the figure four leg-lock.
Write a weeks worth of blog posts just in case the power goes out. Check.
Think about calling my parents to find out what they are doing to prepare for the storm, but get distracted when I get an email from Tyler Tarver. Check. Apparently I’m a part of Tyler’s fantasy football team. I’m not sure what this means. I’m scared.
Get the song “Come On Irene” stuck in my head and sing it for five straight minutes. Check.
Then think about how cool it is to have a hurricane with it’s own theme song. Check.
That thought leads me to Tweet “Come on Irene. I think all hurricanes should be names after songs.” Check.
Then have my wife inform me that the song is actually called “Come On Eileen.” Check.
Use all my Weight Watcher bonus points for the week. Check. I am on WW. I have a certain amount of points that I can’t go above each day. Everything I consume has a point value. A Chipotle burrito has 23 points. I get bonus points for the week that I can dip into. It’s for a party, dinner out, or a splurge here or there. I used them all in one day in preparation for Irene. If the power goes out I don’t know when I’ll get to eat my next meal that doesn’t come out of a can.
Think about calling my parents again but get distracted by all the work my wife is doing to prepare our house for Irene. Check. Who knew the house needed to be spotless in case Irene comes for a visit.
Brainstorm about what movies feature hurricanes. Check.
Come up with zero quality movies about hurricanes. Check.
See a news story about an ice cream shop that is selling their ice cream cheap for fear that the power will go out and it will go bad. Check.
Think about driving out to find some discounted ice cream. Check.
Think about calling my parents again and actually say it out loud. Check.
Have my wife tell me that she’s already talked to them and that they are going to go to Ohio if there is a mandatory evacuation.
This list is meant to be funny. Everything on it is true but I also filled both cars with gas, bought flashlights, and talked to my wife about whether or not we should evacuate. As of now we are sticking it out, but we are watching the storm closely.
Have you ever prepared for a natural disaster? Do you drink Mtn. Dew?
29 Comments
B-rad
on August 26, 2011 at 6:47 am
great post rob! i definitely thought it was come on irene too. haha also i am praying for you and everyone else down there. hope everything turns out ok!
I am kind of nervous about this one. I have done all the necessary preparations at least that I can think of. My daughter and I will just be holed up in the house and trusting that we won’t get hit by a flying VW. It’s always flying VWs that get you. Good luck and stay safe.
These babies are game changers! I’ve never been so worried about a storm before I became a mom. Thanks for helping & not teasing me as I cleaned & packed last night.
I grew up in Southern CA so we had earthquake prep all the time at school…. “get under your desk and cover your head!” I experienced plenty of earthquakes, but none at school. The biggest was the ’94 Northridge one that hit at like 4:30 in the morning. I was like, “What in the world!?” And then went back to sleep…
Hello Hurricane: definitely a song I’ve been playing in my head on repeat. I’ve also been thinking a lot about “Irene” by TobyMac, which has nothing to do with hurricanes, but still.
I have prepared for a natural disaster before. That was Isabel. We prepared by evacuating to my uncle’s house in Radford.
I’m so old I remember when it was still called Mountain Dew. In another few years I expect it to be called MDew, or MD, or . (Yes, that’s just a blank space.)
That said, I do drink Mountain Dew (or Mtn Dew or whatever it’s called) White Out. I don’t mind the original MDew, but White Out is delicious.
When you say you’re drinking White Out, it sounds like eating paste. Maybe I am just thinking about office supplies.
I used to drink Mountain Dew all the time, until it made me super fat and I had to drink the diet… but what kills me is on the bottle is that the official name of the product is not “zero calorie soda” or “zero calorie cola”, but “zero calorie dew”…. as if it truly did roll off of a mountain somewhere.
I had to ask my wife about Haiku-ed.
She is really smart.
I’m glad I could make you laugh.
You should see a doctor because something is wrong with your taste buds.
I’ve never prepared for a storm, sounds like you’ve got all the bases covered. Serious question from an idiot, do you put boards on the windows to keep them from being shattered by wind-whipped projectiles or just because you like it really dark when you sleep.
I used to love Mountain Dew, but had to quit it when I quit caffeine two weeks ago…
We did not put boards on the windows but my in-laws live at VA Beach and they did. We think we are far enough away that we won’t need to do that. We did move our furniture to the center of the room just in case.
Okay – you are just HILARIOUS, ROB!! Good grief – there are real tears in my eyes from laughing at these – and each one was funnier than the one before – just glad I was NOT drinking or eating anything while reading – or it would surely have been all over my computer screen by now – messy, messy…Yes I drink Mountain Dew – but I’m on myfitnesspal.com where all the cool people are, and have lost just over 10 pounds since last month – YAY! You should bring your funny self over and join us – there’s great online encouragement 🙂
Cindy, does it cost? I’m doing Weight Watchers but I’m open for something new. Oh and thanks for laughing. I love making people laugh. Sometimes I don’t know if my ramblings are funny. I’m glad I could make someone laugh.
great post rob! i definitely thought it was come on irene too. haha also i am praying for you and everyone else down there. hope everything turns out ok!
PS. sorry i dont have a gravetar.
B-rad, now worries. It’s not too late. You can still get your gravatar.
I am kind of nervous about this one. I have done all the necessary preparations at least that I can think of. My daughter and I will just be holed up in the house and trusting that we won’t get hit by a flying VW. It’s always flying VWs that get you. Good luck and stay safe.
If you do get hit with a flying VW please let me know if it’s silver. We left ours at home. We ran to the hills to get away.
These babies are game changers! I’ve never been so worried about a storm before I became a mom. Thanks for helping & not teasing me as I cleaned & packed last night.
My pleasure. I’m sorry that I didn’t help more.
I grew up in Southern CA so we had earthquake prep all the time at school…. “get under your desk and cover your head!” I experienced plenty of earthquakes, but none at school. The biggest was the ’94 Northridge one that hit at like 4:30 in the morning. I was like, “What in the world!?” And then went back to sleep…
Nice. I lived in Kansas and we had tornado drills.
There is only one way I prepare for Hurricane Irene. I hope you are ready for this:
http://t.co/UpjK1TH
BOOM!
Moe, that is amazing! Ninja kick Irene.
Hello Hurricane: definitely a song I’ve been playing in my head on repeat. I’ve also been thinking a lot about “Irene” by TobyMac, which has nothing to do with hurricanes, but still.
I have prepared for a natural disaster before. That was Isabel. We prepared by evacuating to my uncle’s house in Radford.
Are you leaving for this one?
To me, the classic hurricane song would be from The Scorpions: HERE I AM!!! ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANE!!! Then again, it’s no “Come on Irene”.
Russ, that is a classic and it’s been in my head.
I’m so old I remember when it was still called Mountain Dew. In another few years I expect it to be called MDew, or MD, or . (Yes, that’s just a blank space.)
That said, I do drink Mountain Dew (or Mtn Dew or whatever it’s called) White Out. I don’t mind the original MDew, but White Out is delicious.
When you say you’re drinking White Out, it sounds like eating paste. Maybe I am just thinking about office supplies.
I used to drink Mountain Dew all the time, until it made me super fat and I had to drink the diet… but what kills me is on the bottle is that the official name of the product is not “zero calorie soda” or “zero calorie cola”, but “zero calorie dew”…. as if it truly did roll off of a mountain somewhere.
Hey, when you eat a typo, you have to cover it with SOMETHING. White Out is the natural choice, right?
White Out is AMAZING! Love it! It’s a game changer.
I also had “Rock You Like a Hurricane” by Def Leopard playing on repeat… good list.
That is a classic song! It’s been in my head as well.
Mountain Dew is gross.
Second bullet made me laugh out loud.
Your wife is really smart.
You just got Haiku-ed.
I had to ask my wife about Haiku-ed.
She is really smart.
I’m glad I could make you laugh.
You should see a doctor because something is wrong with your taste buds.
I’ve never prepared for a storm, sounds like you’ve got all the bases covered. Serious question from an idiot, do you put boards on the windows to keep them from being shattered by wind-whipped projectiles or just because you like it really dark when you sleep.
I used to love Mountain Dew, but had to quit it when I quit caffeine two weeks ago…
We did not put boards on the windows but my in-laws live at VA Beach and they did. We think we are far enough away that we won’t need to do that. We did move our furniture to the center of the room just in case.
Okay – you are just HILARIOUS, ROB!! Good grief – there are real tears in my eyes from laughing at these – and each one was funnier than the one before – just glad I was NOT drinking or eating anything while reading – or it would surely have been all over my computer screen by now – messy, messy…Yes I drink Mountain Dew – but I’m on myfitnesspal.com where all the cool people are, and have lost just over 10 pounds since last month – YAY! You should bring your funny self over and join us – there’s great online encouragement 🙂
Cindy, does it cost? I’m doing Weight Watchers but I’m open for something new. Oh and thanks for laughing. I love making people laugh. Sometimes I don’t know if my ramblings are funny. I’m glad I could make someone laugh.
There’s NO COST! Free free FREE! Just sign up and there’s an app for your phone that will sync to the one online. I’m cindyluuhoo – look me up!
Mtn Dew was also at the top of my hurricane preparedness checklist.
Nick and I watched Hurricane with Denzel Washington. Not about an actual hurricane, but a good movie, and aptly titled none the less. 🙂